Easter Weekend

I just got back from spending the weekend in Wheaton with my family--the first Easter since I really decided to live and walk daily with Christ. This Easter meant more to me than it ever has.

There were a few things that distracted me from my first Easter as a Christ-follower. First of all, I was not at my church where I knew they were rocking out and celebrating LOUDLY. I was at my parents' church which is much more traditional and quiet. There were a few times I wanted SO BADLY to clap or shout or say "amen" but had to sit quietly instead in order not to upset the status quo.

Secondly, the church was PACKED out. We (my brother, his girlfriend, and me) luckily found seats, but we were packed in so tightly that the entire row had to sit and stand at exactly the same time in order not to create a "squeezing an ice cube tightly between your fingers" effect upon sitting or standing.

Finally, as I mentioned above, I was sitting with my brother. It should be a law that we can't sit together in church. When we were younger, we used to fight. Now that we're older, we laugh. I mean, from the unenthused "He is risen. Hallelujeh" recited by the congregation to my stomach growling LOUDLY toward the end of the service, we were laughing.

However, the reverance and meaning of the day finally hit me during the last two hymns. The first was "In Christ Alone" by Stuart Townsend. The words "Till on that cross as Jesus died, The wrath of God was satisfied;For ev'ry sin on Him was laid—
Here in the death of Christ I live" turned on the tears and it wasn't until the end of the Hallelujeh Chorus that my tears stopped.

As I stood there silently sobbing and discreetly wiping away tears, I was thinking about how my friend loved me so much that He died so that I wouldn't have to live in the bondage of fear, hopelessness, guilt, sin, or anger. On top of that, he did it without expecting that I would accept it. In fact, He did it knowing that I could full-out REJECT it or DENY it. But the small chance that I would accept it was worth the torture, torment, and humility that He inevitably had to endure in a human body on the cross. Whoa! No one will ever love me like that again! What an amazing gift!

Selah...