Now that I'm not lonely, empty, sad, etc. I don't have much to say. I guess we all need a little drama in life sometimes just for the entertainment of it all....sad....
I've not been totally un-emotional, though. Like, last week at work there was a cute strawberry blonde little girl about 3 or 4 years old who was running around the store with her brother giggling and screaming and just generally enjoying the moment. The joy she expressed through that belly laugh made me cry. I remember laughing like that. I haven't laughed enough as an adult. Sure, I have belly laughs, but it's usually either at someone's expense or because someone has told an incredibly funny adult joke about something "adult"like politics or something dumb like that. It's mostly for appearances. I don't want to laugh at something so "immature" as farting. I don't know about you, but I still find anything to do with farting hilarious! Even if someone just says, "fart" at the right moment, you'll find me red-faced and hunched over, trying not to pee my pants. Or sometimes, just like that little girl, I laugh just because I'm happy.
I'm so jealous of kids, 'cuz they get to run through stores laughing their heads off for no other reason than that they're happy. No one finds that unusual. Imagine if you or I did that in Target...within seconds, you'd have the police, men in white coats, and an exorcist simultaneously making you walk a straight line with your arms strapped to your body while being knocked in the forehead, "HEAL!!!!"....................Heal??? Is being joyful some sort of disease now among adults? It sure seems like it sometimes. Like, I work with this older woman that always "tsks" us younger girls when we're just being loud and stupid; when we belch or fart and then laugh about it. "It's so uncouth!" she'll say. Yeah, it is uncouth, but sometimes it's just plain funny! Maybe it's not even funny, but life before that moment was just way too serious! I understand that all of life can't just be fun and games, just like school wasn't always recess and lollipops when we were kids. But kids really have it right when they find joy in the times in between all the spankings and time-outs.
The next time I have to do something I dread, like going to the grocery store, I'm going to be a child again. Maybe I won't run around the store screaming, but I'm at least going to push the cart in front of me as fast as I can and then hop on to see how far I can coast before running into something. I'm just going to try to enjoy the "recess" God gives me.
Seriousness is built in to life and joy is something we have to work at. Isn't that totally backwards????....................
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